It was a rainy Saturday morning, December 14th, when we decided to work together to assemble a $100 wood freestanding closet that Amanda had ordered online. Despite the usual tribulations of assembling flat-pack furniture, and the contention of two people trying to comprehend the same under-specified instructions, we successfully assembled it in about an hour without any serious complication. Our marriage survived its first great test—assembling furniture—and we were feeling awesome. What could possibly stop legends like us from achieving amazing things?
Well, apparently finding a home for that closet could. You see, because it was only $100 and about the right size and shape, we hadn’t measured the place where we thought it would go. When we put it there, it took up too much space. When we tried putting it in the guest room, there was already a desk, a bicycle trainer, and stuff for the cat taking up all the space. Dave offered to move the bicycle, but Amanda didn’t want him to be inconvenienced. Still, there was sadness about not having enough space. We decided to take an early nap.
A digression on how to fall asleep
Amanda’s pre-sleep routine is pretty normal. She scrolls the social media or watches videos of people cleaning until her eyes droop, puts down the phone, and sleeps.
Dave, in this and many other things, is weirder. He usually doesn’t take his phone into the bedroom. He just closes his eyes. To fall asleep, he thinks about how to solve a “problem”. Most of these “problems” are not problems for anyone but Dave, and they’re often not anything Dave can do anything about anyway, but trying to solve them puts his mind at ease.
Alas, Dave’s method is a source of constant frustration for Amanda. Most of the time, he’s asleep within two minutes of laying down, filling her with envy. Other times the “problems” he’s trying to solve affect their relationship, so he’ll turn over every little bit and pester her with questions that could affect the rest of their lives together—not the kind of thing that will help her relax and fall asleep.
That was the case this rainy Saturday. As we laid down for our nap, Dave began asking about getting a bigger house. It was something we’d lightly discussed a few times before, but now Dave had that nutty gleam in his eye that is the harbinger of change.
A forever home
We don’t recall if we ever did nap that day. We do recall deciding that the house we buy next should be our forever home—the place we plan to live for the next 40+ years (or until we change our minds, which is ok!). We wanted:
- 3 bedrooms. One for our master and one for each of us as an office (which can be guest rooms when we have visitors).
- 2 baths so neither of us ever has to wait for the other if it’s urgent.
- Near downtown Hilo. Dave still prefers not to drive.
- An attractive home design (especially interior). Critical for Amanda.
- A view worth looking at. Otherwise, it’s not a forever home as we’ll always be dreaming of a house with something more.
- A good place for entertaining guests (local or traveling friends). If you have a view, you want to use it.
Three homes on the market met our criteria, but one of them would’ve been a stretch on the budget and the other was lackluster on the interior layout and the view. That left us with only one current option. We drove by it ourselves that Saturday night, slept on it, and reached out to Dave’s Realtor early Sunday.
The McMahonsion (we hope)
About a mile from downtown with three bedrooms, three baths, two floors, and a two garage, the house met all of our essentials. And the view—well, that was the kicker.
There’s also a hot tub—which now seems like it should’ve been on our required list—a kitchen significantly larger and better laid out than our current kitchen, a living room with the same view as the patio, and an open interior that’s more than satisfying.
The house also has a split air conditioning unit in every bedroom plus the kitchen, a gas fireplace (dunno if we’re gonna use that), and enough space for about six cars in the driveway when we’re entertaining.
As with anything, there are some downsides. The house is expensive; we were able to negotiate down some but we’ll still have a few frugal years ahead of us. The view is over a hill, beneath which is a highway so there’s some road noise when sitting on the patio (closing the doors eliminates almost all of it). There’s a bit of termite damage (common for Hawaii) and Dave is concerned about the age of the roof (our current house sprung a leak in its old roof three days after he bought it, necessitating a $15,000 replacement). However, the new house is also in a lower-risk lava zone and tsunami inundation zone than our current house, so we’re less likely to have some of those problems that are special to Hawaii (and our annual insurance is lower).
The offer
The day after viewing the house, we put in an offer. We didn’t lowball it, but we did negotiate. After some back and forth, we accepted a counteroffer on Saturday the 21st—exactly a week after we assembled the $100 closet.
As of this writing, we’ve deposited our earnest money, the home inspection is scheduled for Wednesday the 1st, and we’re starting to get everything in our current house packed up. If everything goes as scheduled, we’ll take possession in mid-January.
We would love to sell our old house in downtown Hilo to a friend or family member, so please let us know if you have any interest. Otherwise, we’ll be listing it on the market after we complete the purchase of the McMahonsion.
Addenda 2025-01-08: the deal fell through, but we’re still on the hunt for a new house to hold the $100 cabinet!
McHardmahon.com 
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